Swagger. Some have it. Some can’t imagine the point.
I’m one of the latter. I’ve spent some time pondering what sort of walk I should have other than my natural gate (which involves a slight limp due to plantar fasciitis). A little shoulder swing? Maybe a lopsided gate. Hmmm, or perhaps a little arm wave (like I’m swimming in air just a little with every step). A little more bounce? The ole’ limp-left-arm could be cool. If I sagged my pants more, I’d have to add the “keep my pants from falling down waddle,” or the “use one arm for suspenders” walk.
My pants naturally sag a bit because I’m anti-belt and I have to wear my pants for at least four days in a row before washing them. (Freshly washed pants are the worst.) But if I went one size up, I’d really have to focus on keeping the britches from deep-sixing in mid-stride.
Should I adopt something akin to a strut? Proud, confident, assertive. Or perhaps more of a sidle? less obtrusive and more sneaky. Oh, but then there is the saunter. I’ve always been a fan of the chill “I’m so important I’ve got nowhere in particular to be” walk. Or perhaps I should go with my own personal bebop stride. You know, like I’m vibing to my own personal anthem everywhere I go. This would take the most intentional effort, but the rewards could also be the most extreme. How could I possibly be distracted by anything other than myself if I chose a walk that is so involved that it requires constant self-obsession?
Man, so many things to consider when it comes to sending an artificial, constant signal to everyone I come across in public. What if I put off too much machismo? or not enough? How can I be sure of the degree of geek or that I meet the “I’m comfortable with my masculinity” quota? And how do I communicate that I’m walking for exercise and out of social conscious rather than due to losing my license from drunk driving?
To complicate matters, I like to talk to myself while walking. How do I amble just the right amount to ensure I’m not perceived as a raving derelict or an escaped psych ward patient? Wow, this is starting to get really exhausting, and I haven’t even started my new walk yet. Typically, at this point in my mental wanderings, I remember why I’ve never bothered with swagger. I’m entirely too lazy. Even if I wasn’t, it’s a moot point whether a special walk would do anything to counter balance my host of prominent oddities.
Maybe the younger version of me could have pulled off the ole’ limp-left-arm. Meh. I guess I’ll always have the plantar fasciitis shuffle, and I suppose that communicates plenty.
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Lol. I can’t imagine all the kinds of walks you have mentioned, David. First, because of my lack of extensive English vocabulary, I would have to check what every word means and how is that walk.
A video would be very helpful, David. 😉
Before my spinal cord issues my friends used to tell me I walked like a model, not that exaggerated as models walk on a catwalk, mind you, but with that slight hip swing, one foot in front of the other, back very straight. And that I looked like a sylph coming out of the sea, whenever we went swimming. I remember I had long hair at that time. 😄 I didn’t even realise I walked like that! Even with baggy pants, huge t-shirts or sweaters and trainers, it was all unconsciously done. Since my back began to act up in 2015, it’s hard to walk properly nowadays. Intervertebral discs are in a degenerative phase, some already broken, one surgery with 20cm vertical titanium plate in my lower back and nearing end of 2024 I will go through another surgery, on another part of my back, nearer to waist and upwards, as more discs are breaking up. I will be unable to bend completely, but I don’t mind, as long as it helps remove at least 50% of pain, it would be bliss, like after my first surgery.
Oops. I’ve rambled too much! Sorry, I got carried away. Lol.
Have a lovely weekend! Walk well, however you feel comfortable and confident. Be safe.
Love and Light,
Meenaz. 🧡🌟