Homer Simpson has a saying that pretty much sums it up: “To alcohol! The cause of and solution to all of life’s problems.”
Most of us have experienced both edges of this cutting wisdom…or at least witnessed them in action. Some of the world’s most brilliant and most idiotic inventions have been the result of drunken boasts and barroom napkin scrawling. The pet rock and Shark Week (via the Discovery channel) were both the result of partially inebriated conversations at bars. Both of these totally make sense in the same way that I’m positive the invention of the waterbed stemmed from a drunken frat party.
J.K. Rowling has said that her idea for Quidditch stemmed from a visit to a pub after an argument with her then boyfriend. I know a couple of writing buddies who created an entire fictional series based on a barroom bet that started something like this:
“I can write any kind of genre.”
“Cannot. What about the research?”
“No research needed.”
Alright, how about a Western.”
“Easy. All you have to do is put a unicorn in it.”
And from that conversation the series “Unicorn Western” was born. It’s pretty much what it sounds like, and it’s awesome. Oh, and the unicorn can talk.
I had to chuckle recently when watching the pilot episode of Resident Alien (a new Syfy channel show). The main character (an alien in human form) experiences alcohol for the first time, and amidst the buzz his inner monologue decides, “alcohol is helping me think clearly and make rational decisions.” He then declares he will drive to a boy’s house and kill him (which in context is of course a stupid decision).
And thus is the struggle with booze. There is a fine line between unencumbered genius and drunken idiocy. My own journey into indie authorship started in a buddy’s backyard over glasses of Spanish Malbec. I think it was the summer of 2008. They sky was clear, the wine was delicious, and the Kindle had been publicly launched the year before. The times were a changin’.
I had been struggling to pitch my second book to agents, and after the second glass of wine it became apparent I was going about the process all wrong. Instead of trying to pitch a literary southern gothic modern allegory based on the Biblical character of Hosea, I decided to write what made me happy and use tools like Smashwords and Kindle to market the result directly to niche readers.
The plan made perfect sense…and if I would have written something other than what I dubbed Reeferpunk (alternate history weird western action stories based on a world where cannabis would eventually reveal the secret of restoring the universe) my indie author success probably would have blossomed a bit earlier on.
Since that summer evening (over twelve years ago), I’ve written over a million words of fiction. And I’ve loved doing it. But my process has been a bit like quail hunting at night. I hear the birds take flight and spray pellets everywhere with little focus or result. (Not that I’ve ever tried quail hunting at night or would recommend doing so.) All I know is that I’m not yet where I want to be.
The reason for this is either too many evenings spent drinking wine in the backyard…or too few. I’ll let history decide.
At the Desk This Week
This week I carved out the space to get back into season 3 of The Green Ones, and it was a breath of fresh air. I was able to catch back up on the first few episodes and patch some holes in episode 4. I’m only one scene away from finishing episode 4 at this point. I was also able to more firmly map out the last two episodes of season 3. At this point, I have a fairly solid idea of where they need to go. I’m sure the plan will still change before I get there, but I’m better set up to get the job done with less back and forth. I figured out how to pair up the main characters heading into the end of the season. I also figured out exactly where I want this season to fall on the time line relative to my other series in Schism 8, which is important because Grisha Petrosian shows up in three of the series in pretty rapid succession. He’s a wily SOB across the multiverse, so I’m glad to be nailing his timeline down a bit.
I’ll finish streaming The Austin Job, Season 2 of Lost DMB Files on Substack this week and will begin streaming Season 3 next week!
If You Wish to Start Reading The Green Ones…
[Click here to start at the beginning.]
Thanks so much for taking the time to read these scenes of Boundaries, Season 2 of The Green Ones. I’ll be publishing FREE daily scenes from The Green Ones until…I die…or something terrible happens. Seriously, I’ve got over 100 scenes written so far, and I’ll be writing more until the story reaches its natural ending. You are totally welcome to read the entire story for FREE! If at any point you decide you would rather finish the story in ebook or print format, just click the buttons below and you can do that as well. If you enjoy reading the serial releases, BUT you would also like to support me as a writer (my kids need wine!) please subscribe to my premium content for bonus scenes, exclusives, and insider access to my process. And of course, I’d be grateful if you would share this post with any of your reader friends who you think would enjoy The Green Ones. Happy reading!