Recently, I’ve begun the delicate process of watching The Simpsons with my youngest son. He’s eleven. Now, if you are thinking to yourself, “The Simpsons? That moral bleck? What sort of deranged lunatic enjoys the Simpsons? And then exposes his children to it? Will someone please think of the children!” Then you can stop reading now and unfollow me. We have nothing further to discuss.
Okay, now that we’ve got that ugliness behind us, where was I? Oh yes, my youngest son and I have begun watching the Simpsons together. He has been asking to watch “Daddy’s cartoon” since he was five. Back then, I told him he would have to wait until he was ten. It seemed like such a ridiculously far off number that the time would never come, and if it did he certainly would have long forgotten our arrangement. The time did come, and forget he did not.
Don’t get me wrong, I love the Simpson’s, and I love that my son has taken an interest in what I consider to be the most impactful television show of my generation. I was thirteen when (right underneath my parent’s neglectful eye) I began watching the Simpsons shorts on The Tracey Ullman Show. I’ve spent nearly 1,000 hours watching and rewatching the first twenty seasons of The Simpsons. But, there are certain episodes I don’t really want to sit through (and then explain) to my eleven-year-old. Like the episode featuring Marge’s breast enhancement, for example.
Skipping over said inappropriate episodes is only the first challenge. The more time consuming task is explaining all the cultural references that fly right over my poor, little guy’s head. When I notice his laughter is more fake than real, or when he has been silent for a bit too long, I know I need to pause the show and field some questions. I mean, the stuff he has no means of understanding is far greater than I had originally anticipated.
Some humor is universal. When Principal Skinner asks the school hamster “Nibbles” to chew through his ball sack…while bound inside a large sack normally used to contain the school’s dodge balls, we can all laugh at that. Well, even if you don’t find that particular joke funny, at least you understand the meaning. So does my son. When Bart and Lisa are having a competition on the school bus to see if an apple or an orange will roll to the front of the bus first and Ralphie tosses down his own contribution with the exclamation, “Go banana!” viewers of all ages can enjoy a chuckle.
But these sorts of sight gags and potty humor only account for a small percentage of the overall humor of The Simpsons. To be honest, some of the jokes escape me to this day. I’m going to stop typing right now to look up Rory Calhoun. (I’ve wondered about this reference for three decades!) Hmmm. Okay. He was an actor. I guess the joke was a non sequitur when Monty Burns commented that the greyhound puppy standing on his hind legs reminded him of “the person who’s always standing and walking”, and then Smithers automatically guessed Burns was referring to Rory Calhoun. Personally, my favorite non-sequitur-type-moment in the Simpsons is when Lisa quotes Pablo Neruda and Bart’s dismissive response is, “I am familiar with the works of Pablo Neruda.” Hmmm, I guess that’s not really a non sequitur, but totally unexpected none the less.
You get the point! If an episode is titled, “The Bart of Darkness” I have to explain that this is a reference to a book my son will probably never read because our society will no longer believe in books by the time he gets to high school. When Monty sings his classic hit, “See my Vest,” I have to explain it is to the tune of “Be My Guest” from the Disney movie, “Beauty and the Beast” (which my son will also probably never see). When the two greyhound dogs each start at opposite ends of a spaghetti noodle and then fight over it rather than kiss, I have to explain this is a reference to an even older Disney movie that my son will never see. It’s exhausting!
Anyway, I suppose I’m grateful for the cultural service the Simpsons continues to provide for all of us. Without this wonderful show, I would know so much less about everything from “Cat on a Hot Tin Roof” to the succession order of Ayatollah Nakhbadeh, to Ayatollah Zahedi, and finally Ayatollah Razmara. And now my youngest son will learn about all of these wonders as well.
At the Desk This Week
Wow. Just…wow. The world just keeps getting crazier. Could we actually use some of this madness as an excuse to come closer together? Have the Bullies of the world taken things too far? [sigh] I’m guessing probably not. But I’m hoping. I’m still hoping.
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