This week, I experienced what every father dreads when snooping through their teenage son’s browser history. And what do you think his most common search term has been over these last few weeks?
“How many days until [my birthday]”
That’s right. My oldest son can’t even be bothered to do the simple arithmetic necessary to calculate the number of days between now and his birthday (which is coming up embarrassingly soon). I’m not saying he could count the days on his fingers, but it ain’t anywhere near triple digits. Is this simply the result of living in a world of hyper-convenience? A world where Alexa can answer everything from “what time is it” (even though there is an analog clock hanging on the wall) to “where do farts come from?” (even though you know good and well where they come from...and it ain’t Machu Picchu.)
Are devices to blame? Individualism? Covid? or any one of the ever-present existential crises of impending doom? I know my son is capable of simple math. What makes him choose his Google brain over his biological one? One of the best things school ever did for me was birthed from this thing called “number sense.” Back in the day, in Texas, we had this thing called University Scholastic League or UIL. (My Google brain tells me it still exists.) Anyway, I remember it being a nerd competition with the sneaky benefit of excusing all the contestants from the slog of normal school. (Some nerds are wicked stoopid that way.)
My favorite UIL competition was number sense. It consisted basically of a bunch of long-form mathematics. The twist was that no pencil work was allowed. That’s right. For once, it was bad to show your work. Can I get a hallelujah? The phrase “show your work” has been my mathematical bugaboo since farmer Brown had five apples taken away from his orchard consisting of fifty trees bearing 124 apples each. Why can’t I just give you the answer? I mean, the answer is what farmer Brown really needs, right? So he can ensure his laborers didn’t make off with any of the precious sugar-crisp booty?
To this day, thanks to number sense, I can calculate my gas milage at the pump in a matter of seconds. I can keep a running tab in order to estimate the cost of a cart full of groceries within a few dollars. (This was more important back when my debit card dictated what I could walk away with. Having to put back a head of cabbage because you don’t have enough cabbage in the bank is a little embarrassing, even for me.)
Anywho, all of this leads me to ask where I have gone wrong with my own children. And what happens when my eldest starts turning to Google for psychoanalysis? When he types in the search term, “Why am I so screwed up?” or “What makes me hide sugar packets all over my room?” (Did you know fruit yogurt is one of the biggest sugar bombs on the shelves? Apparently it’s true!… or at least that’s what my Google brain tells me.)
The problem is, these are questions that need to be worked out the old fashioned way by long-form-braining. You gotta take some terrible job out of a twisted need to prove yourself before finally figuring out you don’t need to become your father or marry your mother. This is stuff Alexa and/or Siri just can’t tell you. You gotta get off your butt and go figure out the answers along the meandering path of life, not through an extensive browser search.
What am I saying? I’m saying that as wonderful as all this technology stuff is, we still gotta have a wet brain that will boot up and work when we need it. But I’m not sure how to give kids these days (and adults) the workout regimen they need to keep the ole’ medulla oblongata greased up and running smoothly.
Blast From the Past!
The book below is actually one my former publishing company first published a few years back. Me and a handful of my buddies spent over a hundred hours dreaming up the story world for this one, and it’s a total blast. A handful of authors have now taken it and run with it. I wish them success with their upcoming novels based in this universe!
If You Wish to Start Reading The Green Ones…
[Click here to start at the beginning.]
Thanks so much for taking the time to read these scenes of Boundaries, Season 2 of The Green Ones. I’ll be publishing FREE daily scenes from The Green Ones until…I die…or something terrible happens. Seriously, I’ve got over 100 scenes written so far, and I’ll be writing more until the story reaches its natural ending. You are totally welcome to read the entire story for FREE! If at any point you decide you would rather finish the story in ebook or print format, just click the buttons below and you can do that as well. If you enjoy reading the serial releases, BUT you would also like to support me as a writer (my kids need wine!) please subscribe to my premium content for bonus scenes, exclusives, and insider access to my process. And of course, I’d be grateful if you would share this post with any of your reader friends who you think would enjoy The Green Ones. Happy reading!